It’s hard to know HOW to get what you want before you’re clear on WHAT you want. Here’s my process to clarify the What before the How…
Originally published 2010. Updated 28 June 2018 and 22 November 2024.
Why do so many of us never start down the road to what we really want? Why do we let fear and doubt get in the way of our success?
One of the reasons so many people never follow through on their dreams and aspirations is that they’re too busy thinking about the “how” before they have thought deeply enough about the “what”.
Here’s how to get what you want…
Don’t get ahead of yourself
Let’s say it’s always been a dream for you to start your own business. But whenever you begin thinking about it seriously, your thoughts turn to all the things that could go wrong, or all the hard work and risk involved in being self-employed.
You start asking questions like: What if I can’t get finance? How will I cope if my income drops? Do I have the skills and experience to run my own company? How can I own a business when I know nothing about accounting?
Thinking about how you’re going to achieve success before you’re even clear on what you want to achieve can lead you into a quagmire of seemingly insurmountable obstacles, and stall your progress before you even begin.
1. Turn a Dream into a Goal
The first step to success in reaching a goal is to identify exactly what it is you want. And I mean exactly.
Make your goal challenging but achievable, and make it as specific as you can.
“To get rich by having my own business” is not a goal, it’s a daydream.
Add numbers and dates to your goal; make it bold, clear and concise. Then it’s a goal.
For example, your goal could be something like, “To have my own successful business in central Auckland called Flora’s Flowers Ltd earning at least $80,000 annual net profit by 1 December 2026”.
2. Confirm Your Goal’s Alignment
Once you’ve written down your goal, take a good hard look at it.
- Is it what you really want?
- Does it fit with your values?
- Is it realistic?
- Do you think you can reach it if you really put in the effort?
You may need to adjust your goal until you’re truly happy with it.
3. Put Strategies in Place to Achieve Your Goal
Now that you have something concrete to work towards, you’ll find your thinking will change from, “It’s too overwhelming” to “How do I make this work?”.
Write down all the things you need to do to achieve the goal. Flesh it out over time if need be.
If you get stuck, one trick is to work backwards from the goal. Itemise all the steps you need to take to get to where you want to be, but do it in reverse order.
You’ll start to see obstacles as challenges, and hard work as something enjoyable.
Change Your Mindset to Get What You Want
Life coaching can help you to change your thinking habits so they work with you, not against you. This is how to get what you want.
When you have a dream, don’t get ahead of yourself. First, turn it into a goal, and then put sound strategies in place to get you to where you want to be.
Don’t put the cart before the horse – always think about the “what” before the “how”.
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